Tuesday, 26 August 2008

In Celebration of Late Mum

Today marks another anniversary of both my Late Mother's birthday and passing and this year being the 5th and, up to now, the least painful, I decided to find some photo's of her sharing things she enjoyed the most and which show her in her element or otherwise enjoying the good times.

The top photo was taken on her 60th birthday and I enjoyed looking through the photo's taken that day at the bbq in her garden having found it difficult previously and chose this one where she opens her gift of a gold watch jointly bought by myself and two brothers.

Just two years later, and on the occasion of no.2.son's birthday this came from a set which would be the last we took of her on 30th July before she died just a month later on her own birthday, 26th August aged just 62yrs. I chose this photo as she looks the least pained (and scared, for I found out a year or so later that at this point in time she did in fact know she was terminally ill where I was led to understand - for my own emotional good, I expect, - that she was not in possession of that information). Always one to hide things and put on a brave face, she did so for my son's birthday even managing to eat her food and take a drink. One week exactly after this photo and she was in hospital on morphine and we sat with her daily until she passed.

Here she is at Christmas! taken a few years ago just a little before her 60th, after she'd redecorated her house and bought new furniture; I'm pleased now that she did embark on this expensive project and that she had a couple of years to enjoy it after having scrimped and saved and lived very modestly for the most part, she was proud to have a nicely turned out house! Enjoying a glass of sherry which I now drink at Christmas time too, thinking about her.

The photo above "a pair of mad cows" and the photo below were taken, again around the time of her 60th birthday, when the entire family including my brothers, all went out for a days hiking at the local hills. Below is my brother, Martin, my youngest son and Mum and I.

Mum enjoyed the countryside having been brought up and lived mostly, she disliked town lifestyle and was frustrated by the nearness of (noisy) neighbours. Yesterday as part of a day out we visited the lane where she was brought up - very much changed now! and had a drink in the local pub where my Late Grandma used to drink and play dominoes rather too regularly for Late Mum's liking!

My Mum's last sewn project - a skirt. For years she resisted a return to dressmaking, through my interest and classes I was taking she picked it up again and bought a new sewing machine and we had something in common at last.

As well as the countryside and animals that we shared a common interest in throughout my childhood, we shared later in my passion for sewing! She wasn't an easy woman to get on with and we worked hard to find things in common but I'm proud that she rediscovered her own passion for sewing through me and above is her enjoying her computerised embroidery machine with her stepdaughter (then pregnant with her son). At the time she was reluctant to buy this machine saying "why would I spend this money when I have cancer and not long to enjoy it?" but we were all pleased when she did buy it albeit she didn't enjoy it for nearly long enough, just a very short 18months. I have this machine now and she asked me to enjoy on her behalf.

This isn't the best shot by any means of her garden but it is the other end of the photo from the top of her celebrating her 60th birthday and shows my two sons eating their party food. A small and square town garden with rubbish soil, she worked extremely hard to produce a garden filled with flower beds, fish pond, hanging baskets, rockery and little paths - if she'd had a larger garden she'd have been in heaven! Mum would drop everything - even sewing! - for a spot of gardening and after her beloved horses this was surely her 2nd passion of her life.

My Late Mum and I, together, on the occasion of our joint 60th and 40th birthday celebrations in a countryside pub after a family lunch - I miss you Mum! xxxx




Jules said...

I can so relate to this Sue. My father died a couple years back very unexpectedly a month before my son was born. I don't think the month he died (Feb) is as tough as this time of year we have now. Kids starting school...he always was so involved with them. The new things the baby learns, new shows starting on television, football starting up, all the things we'd be discussing right now. For some reason, it's been tough lately. Really really tough. I think about him a lot more. And even though my husband is SUCH a good man, my dad...well there was no one that ever loved me quite like that.

I felt your love in your post. And I'm so glad you guys were able to find things in common. We were able to do that too & I thank God for being able to share so much with him.

Anonymous said...

Great post Sue. Thanks for all the pictures.